Mind~Body~Spirit

Do you really listen to your body?  Do you value what it tries to tell you?

In that a lot of my adult life I have been holding onto disorder eating, I came to realize that I was a worried mind seemingly detached from my body. I ignored it!  If it was hungry, tired, sore, or sick I rarely stopped to listen to it.  I was so into the disorder that dictated what I should or shouldn’t be eating, how much I ate or whether I needed to purge it out ~ I essentially tuned myself out.

Now, after doing a lot of personal work with some amazing coaches, I live in my mind/body/spirit connection.  They all work in unison.  I use my lovely body as my compass that will direct me in living my right life.

 Last weekend as I tried to climb a mountain ten miles high, part of it in the snow, I forgot about paying attention to my body. I have always compared overcoming my eating disorder to that of ascending a mountain, envisioning that if I ever worked my way to the top, I would have the eating disorder under control.  So last weekend, I told myself “this adventure represents the mountain of your life and you have to make it to the top.  (One of my life’s lessons has been that it is not ever a good idea to say “I have to”).

Most of the climb went well as I hiked up to the top, but at 7500 feet the climb was much, much harder than I had imagined.  At that point, I got very dizzy and weak.  My fingers were frozen and hurting; my body did not want to move, however my stubbornness didn’t listen to my body, even as I kept sliding back down in the snow.   

I finally sat and tried to be calm by taking deep breathes to soothe myself. As I sat there in the stillness, it dawned on me that I was not listening at all to my body.  Did I ask its opinion? Did I trust that my body would give me guidance along this pathway? No, I treated it as if it weren’t a part of this adventure; like it didn’t even matter.  

I had forgotten about my mind/body/spirit working together.  Once again, it was my mind disconnected from my body.  I truly believe I can do anything, when I trust my amazing body and listen to what tries to tell me.

I ended up walking back down the mountain. I felt much better at the lower elevation out of the snow. No, I didn’t make the climb that day, but I will be back after the snow melts.   The lesson learned that day totally overshadowed making it to the top ~ stay in touch with my body!

We all descend mountains everyday in our lives, be it overcoming something like an eating disorder, working at a job that we don’t like or anything else.  Every day we give it our all. Our bodies signal us every day when it needs rest, food or maybe it just needs for us to stop and feel a feeling that we have been pushing away.   

Mind, body and spirit ~ we think, we listen to how our bodies feel,  and we have spiritual time.  This trio makes mountain climbing so much easier. 

 

Slow down…..

Do you find that you start a project excited, gung-ho and full of energy?  Then you find as you try to keep up that pace, you fizzle out? It’s that feeling of a car revving up and up until it totally runs out of gas. I think our bodies wonder….”is she excited or stressed?”  It gets confused and tired after a while!

I get it! I am there! I am what the Kolbe index calls a “Quick Start” through and through. I tend to jump high and fast with both feet into whatever I intend to do. I excitedly work at a high pace giving it 110% until I run up against a barrier of some sort, then I crash. Then it’s “Oh crap, what am I doing”?

I am learning that I need to ask myself at that point, “Deb, what do you really need right now”? The answer is almost always deep rest or play, because both are needed to survive this crazy life that we all live! Then…..after awhile……I dust myself off, and begin again…..but slowly…..in turtle steps. I want to work toward significant change, but I can’t get there at such a high-speed. I need to align my body, soul and spirit to work in unison between rest and play. Then magic can happen that I could never had caused with my quick start brute force!

We can have an unlimited source of energy if we listen to our essential selves (our true selves that we were born with). It’s that little voice that is inside of us that we know is there, but we so often ignore. She is very wise and has been through a lot. She knows you like know one else does. She knows your dreams and what you are capable of.

Close your eyes ~ breath in the quietness ~ there, can you feel her now ~ follow her lead.

What makes your heart smile?

Don’t cha just love it when your HEART SMILES?  

You know that ahhh feeling when you feel like melting?  When you can’t help but grin?

You can go to that place, you know….even in the middle of your hectic day, you can get to that state of bliss?

How?

Just take a minute and close your eyes….take a deep breath and lean in.  Imagine your favorite things, smells, tastes, sounds.

My own:  puffy cotton clouds ~ the smell of popcorn ~ holding my cat against my chest ~ fuzzy caterpillars ~ taste of coffee in the morning ~ 
smell of rain on concrete ~ vibrant tulip colors ~ the roar of the ocean ~
a newborn’s soft skin ~ happy tears ~ waterfalls ~ my husband’s brown eyes ~ my favorite song ~

What about your very favorite things?  I-M-A-G-I-N-E

Looking for new shoes?

Do you ever think about your life and how satisfied you are; have you ever looked down at your feet and thought, “hmmm, something just doesn’t look right”?
Are you doing just okay in your day to day shoes or do you ever long to wear –  let’s say RED HIGH HEELS or maybe even NIKE’s? I know, it sort of feels easier to wear the ones that are on your feet right now, but it is okay to think about what else you might try on.

I have been feeling that way – in my black pumps that I wear to work during the day. They still look nice, but they just don’t fit me anymore. They are strangling my toes and actually constricting my heart.

I have a seemingly normal good life, but I know I was meant to do something else. I know that I am meant to be a life coach and the more that I delve into learning the coaching craft; the more it actually opens my heart.

It can be scary though. I mean, “what if I fail”?  Living life means that we must fail to learn.  But the scarier thought to me is “what if I do nothing and  just stay where I am”? If I decide to live my life in these tight black pumps, then my life will remain the same. I would not be able to help my clients decide to take off their own tight shoes. I have a voice in coaching that I am meant to use.

So what do you say, just for now, let’s take a walk by the ocean, remove our shoes and give them a toss? Then we can run barefoot in the warm sand for awhile until we decide what our next pair will be.

Freedom

I have been thinking a lot lately about mini-miracles, God winks, power of intension, or my latest term, God’s high fives!  I believe that they are always happening, always around us, but if we are too busy or in our heads, we miss them. 

I began to notice them in my life about a year ago.  It was my birthday, I was turning fifty and I just had an “inner urge” to get a laptop, literally I just knew it!  All reasoning said that I did not need one.  We had a regular PC in our spare bedroom and we really couldn’t easily afford it.  BUT, I am stubborn - I ordered one in orange!  Why orange?  At the time, the color just said “yes” to my soul.  I later came to know that the color means “fun, socialization and energy”.  I chose “freedom” as the password.  I knew that this orange box that sat on my lap would mean freedom in my life and that it would be instrumental. 

From there, the “high fives from God” began.  I found Christine Kane blogs that nourished my soul and I began writing my own blog.  By way of other mini miracles, I found an amazing life coach that was able to show me the road away from my eating disorder that had plagued me for years. 

Again, I felt an urge…. to be closer to my out of town family - enter FACEBOOK.  I started connecting with my nieces and nephews, friends and eventually my sisters!   One sister even bought a laptop without knowing a thing about computers, learned how to use it and is now writing and sharing beautiful inspirational pieces.    

I am now taking a Martha Beck life coach course on my orange “social” laptop, to coach others and show them how to find their own roads to their essential selves. 

I can now honestly say…..trust your instincts , watch for those “high fives from God”.  If we can stop and really be in tune to ourselves, amazing things can happen.  

The Miracle of You

Pick up some courage and walk over to the mirror.  Don’t just walk on by it, stop and really look.  Stand naturally, don’t hold in your belly or flip your hair just so, but really look at the amazing you.  

Check out those eyes, see the pupils?  As you hold that gaze for another minute you can actually see…..you. You are looking at the same eyes that you had at six and sixteen.  Think of all that they have witnessed, from triumph to tragedy, the joy, the miracles of the every day adventures.   

Now, can you stand back and look at your body as a whole.  Put your hand on your tummy.  Yes, I know it’s round and not the perfect shape that you desire, but really feel it.  Is it gurgling from hunger or quietly happy?  You are living in this body, it is your house, your means of transportation around the world.  No matter what the size, shape, color, texture, this miracle is you.

Now just think this is the only body that you will ever have.  As they say “life isn’t a dress rehearsal”, this is it.  Knowing that, can you find acceptance for your lovely body.  No, it’s not perfect.  It never will be, but it’s yours!  If you treat it kindly, nourish it, fall in love with it, just think of how life changing that could be?   If your mind & soul connect and are in total acceptance of your body, then the inner war will end.  They will all be on the same side.  Just think of the possiblities……

Life is an Adventure

I created a vision board about a year ago.  When I designed my board,  I placed any items on it that made my essential self say “yes” and that just felt right to me.  Now, as I sit here and look at my board, I can’t help but smile as I see that it is becoming more and more a reality.  

The words “Life is an Adventure”, “Yes I can” and “Life coach” are on the board.  Then lo and behold, I ended up working with a life coach through various God winks;  one thing lead to another and last January I decided to become a life coach myself.  I began taking the Martha Beck life coach training course which lead to last weekend’s “meet and greet” in Arizona.  There I met other coaches in training that I have been corresponding with. It ended up being one of the best weekends of my life as we got to spend the day listening to Martha Beck and get to know one another.  I now see that I am living my best life and having kick ass life adventures! 

If we set our intentions for miracles to happen in our lives, they will happen.  Believe, pray, know that you know amazing things will line up in your favor, then just watch and say WOW!

How to survive a day of work woes

Have you ever had a day at work when you wanted to just disappear! Did you find yourself sneaking off to hide?

I did that just today! I had “over the edge” stress and wanted to get away. I found a spot in the women’s bathroom in the far corner stall. I don’t know why I headed there; I guess to try to bring myself back to a place of calm. I felt like a nervous child waiting for the principle (my boss) to come and find me. Then I remembered something that I read in one of Martha Beck’s books. She said in moments of stress, take a long deep breath and repeat “in this moment, I am okay”…. breathe, relax……until the stress fades, until you feel okay. I repeated that over a few times and I did feel my stress melt away. I was able to walk out of the stall and go back to work in a calmer state of mind.

We live with the proverbial work woes and it isn’t good for our bodies, minds or souls to get that stressed out. If we can learn to take care of ourselves throughout the day, life can be so much better.

• How about slowing down to breathe, pray or think calming thoughts
• Maybe take a walk outside in the fresh air
• Be in the present moment. Look around at the passing clouds or the color of your scarf. Try to feel your toes. Just be.
• It’s okay. Allow yourself to feel your feelings. To stop and realize that “yes, I am feeling angry now, but I am okay”.
• Have patience with yourself and ask yourself “what is this here to teach me?”

Life is not perfect. There will always be sometimes that you will want to take shelter and hide. Just know that it is okay, you are okay, and the moment will pass.

No McDonald’s tonight :-)

There it was “McDonalds”, those damn golden arches. 

Work was less than wonderful today and there was my chance to not feel, but eat junk food instead.  I knew that what I needed was to go home, go for a nice walk, and take time to really feel my feelings instead of stuff them.  I would then eat a dinner that would make my essential self smile.  I would care for me. 

So as I drove beside McD’s, meaning to drive on by - I turned into their driveway.  My inner wild child was saying “yes” and my dictator self was saying “what the heck are you doing?”  I pulled up to the big menu and ordered a large McFlurry.  The voice said the machine was broken.  I then ordered a sundae or maybe a milkshake.  The voice said it wasn’t working either.  You have got to be kidding me!  I then drove on out of the drive-thru. 

I knew that was supposed to happen!  “Thank you God” I prayed.  It was a total amazing ”ah-ha God wink” moment.  That ice cream outage showed me that my old life of bingeing just isn’t an option anymore.  Life is so, so much more than that.

Do you ever notice that as you listen to your essential self that little sycronicities seem to happen.  It’s like life lines up in your favor.  Follow your heart, listen to your inner wisdom.  It won’t steer you wrong.

I’m riding the wave of my high and loving it

I heard a student say just that today in my university office! She walked through the door and said,  “Hey Debi, I’m riding the wave of my high and loving it”.  

It actually caught me off guard!  What was she talkin’ about?  Actually she just left her ”business management” class and was feeling great.    She loved how her instructor taught with such enthusiasm and spirit. She was psyched!  The energy in the room soared in that moment.  The whole vibration changed.  The student passed that exuberance onto me until I felt like I was riding the wave too. 

That got me thinking – can I affect others in that way?  As people leave my office, what energy do I leave them with?  I mean, I work in an establishment where the moral is pretty low right now.  There seem to be more highs than lows and you can feel it in the air.  I notice that I don’t smile as much as I used to.  I seem to grudgingly do my work and not let my essential self come out and play.  

For the rest of the day my step was lighter.  I greeted the students as they came in the door with eye contact and genuine interest.  I still got my work done, but I felt so much better.  I like making a difference in life.  I want to pass on a “wave of high” like the student did for me today.